I don't know what to call this

Everyday I wake up
I feel like I'm on a mission
Striving to walk that fine line...
Fine line between causes
Like on your left there's
Darfur, Jena 6 and the Saudi
woman who was sentenced
to 50 sum odd lashes for being
gang raped.
And on your right there are
women's rights, animal rights,
Humanitarianism and race relations.
And yet I can't decide which to give
my time to.
Judging its worthiness by
the open spaces in my schedule &
by the pennies left after I've bought
my 5Th Carmel Machiatto of the week
Not knowing how to even begin to
become apathetic to...
To starvin children in africa
to little girls being raped in darfur
to iraqi children who can't play outside alone
because they might fall victim to a car bomb
to women who are beat in their own homes
to people who are discriminated against
to animals that are taught to fight for
someone else's profit
to children who never had
a chance in the world because
the system has their names written
all over it.

I struggle to feel apathy for
someone or...
something else but my selfishness...
My selfishness is thinking,
Who was there when I sought solace in
my parents bed
the nights when my blood cells would
wrap themselves around my veins
causing pain?
Never knowing that my father feelin on
me could hurt worse.
Who was there to tell me that
I had rights when my
first date held a
gun to my mentality
stealing my virginity?
Who was there???
Then I remember...
It was just me.
Where did I get the strength,
the faith
to get up and dust myself off
to take everything that
I've ever been through
every hospital that I've ever been in
and every hurt that I ever let
seep through my pores
and hang Them not Me
from that noose that's on reserve
in my back yard in the event
that I decided that I couldn't
take this anymore.
But, yet and still,
there is a part of me
that hurts and aches
for all the people in the world with
no way out.
Struggling to walk the line because
I can't choose a side
But if their is one thing that I know
Its that,
if I wanted to,
I wouldn't have to go far
because Charity,
Really does
Start at home.